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snorkackcatcherFrom the General LJ Grumble department:
You may have seen me mention before now that I occasionally set a pub quiz on Sunday nights, on a loose rota with a few others. The latest attempt at this - well, let's say that things Didn't Quite Go According To Plan.
Anyway, one of the other questionmasters tends to frustrate everybody by having a section called 'Songs Any Cool Dude Would Have In His Record Collection'. While this might be true, the songs themselves tend to be thoroughly obscure. You know, it powered all the way to Number 72! In the indie chart. Of Outer Mongolia. In 1958. Oh, and this was the B-side.
They also tend to be recorded from old, scratchy vinyl onto clapped-out tape and then played through the pub's alleged 'sound system'. Which, it is safe to say, is not the very latest in high-quailty audio reproduction - the landlord keeps trying new bits of equipment, and each time things actually seem to get worse. If you can even hear the Cool Dude songs, you're doing well.
Annoyed by this (and since it's my birthday shortly and I felt like indulging myself) I thought I'd have a go as well - twenty excellent tracks that didn't chart in the UK. Album tracks, B-sides, live tracks, songs that simply weren't hits. Except that mine were (mostly) supposed to be ones that were nonetheless quite well known, or ones where if you listened carefully you could work out the title and/or artist. I decided to circumvent the tape problem by ripping the tracks, extracting an appropriate minute or so of each, and burning a CD to keep it all digital rather than transferring everything to tape. Nothing could possibly go wrong, could it?
A fellow called Murphy is probably shaking his head sadly at this point.
The first snag came when it turned out that the CD player wasn't part of the latest incarnation of the sound system - it was an add-on plugged into it, and thus subject to loss of quality. I should have realised what was about to happen when I arrived at the pub and heard the very faint sound coming from the Abba CD that was playing, but I didn't, so when I came to play the CD it proved impossible to get a decent sound level even with the volume setting jammed on maximum.
Of course, this was far too loud when using the microphone, and whatever settings had been there originally were totally lost trying to get that to work without massive feedback. It's a small pub with a narrow bar; eventually, it turned out that the only way to prevent the mike picking up the sound from the speakers was to lean over the sink, where there was a bit of wall either side to block the sound. Of course, this meant that I was permanently in the way of the barmaid whenever she wanted to clean a glass. And naturally, there was a mouthy member of the ladies darts team shouting "Hold it away from you!" at every bit of feedback (if I'd moved it much further away, I think I'd have needed to hold it with my feet). It would have felt very good to be able to tell her exactly where to stick it. :)
All this might not have mattered if the pub had been as quiet as it sometimes is in the winter, but this time of course it was packed, with many other conversations going on. The overall effect was much what I expect Muffliato would sound like. Eventually I just gave up on the music sction (as had most of the teams), scribbled down full marks for everyone and moved on.
For the second half, I went to the tape - i.e. the cassette I'd rccorded from the CD for use in emergencies. The current cockup seemed to qualify, and for a while it seemed it might actually work - one of the locals managed to adjust the settings appropriately for the 'connection' round. Unfortunately, this was still too loud for using the mike, and by the time we got to the second section of 'Cool Dude' tracks everything seemed back to normal - i.e. you couldn't hear a damn thing.
By this time, I'd overrun so much with all the delays it was getting close to 11pm anyway, so I just gritted my teeth and cut the last three tracks.
Very few points were scored on this section ...
Next week's questionmaster is supposed to be working out some better way of doing things (mind you, he's been saying that for a while now). His recommendation for improving the current sound system was to use a sledgehammer. This is a suggestion I can see the merits of.
All in all, this was a far more irritating and embarrassing experience than it should have been. Let's classify it under the heading "experiments that didn't quite work". Next time, I do "20 Tracks You Could Identify From A Few Bars Even If They Were Being Sung At A Bad Karaoke Session On The Other Side Of The Street".
For the record (pun not intended), the 20 'Cool Dude Tracks' were as follows. Consider them musical Niffles if you will. :)
Beatles – Being for the Benefit of Mr Kite (from Sergeant Pepper)
Simple Minds – Mandela Day (not a single, oddly)
Madness – In the City (B-side of Cardiac Arrest)
Tommy Bruce – Babette (didn't chart)
Robbie Williams – Me and My Monkey (from Escapology)
R.E.M. – Fall On Me (from Life’s Rich Pageant)
UB40 – Tyler (from Signing Off)
Chicory Tip – Cigarettes Women and Wine (didn't chart)
Slade – One Way Hotel (from Sladest)
Boomtown Rats – (I Never Loved) Eva Braun (from the wonderful A Tonic For The Troops)
Oasis – Rock and Roll Star (from Definitely Maybe)
Sammy Davis Jnr – Mr Bojangles (didn't chart)
Leonard Cohen – The Partisan (from Songs From A Room)
Pluto – I Man Bitter (didn't chart)
The Coral – Talkin' Gypsy Market Blues (from Magic and Medicine)
Pulp – Underwear (from Different Class)
Fairground Attraction – Broken By a Breeze (live in Tokyo)
Jam – The Butterfly Collector (B-side of When You’re Young)
The Postal Service – The District Sleeps Alone Tonight (download)
Moody Blues – The Voice (didn't chart, from Long Distance Voyager)
Oh yes - that 'connection' round. The idea is that I play extracts from six tracks; the teams get bonus points by taking a word from either the title or the artist for a general connection unrelated to the songs. Nobody managed to get enough tracks right to spot the connection, which was annoying - I thought (a), (d), and (f) were easy enough, and (b) and (e) very gettable ((c) was tougjh, but it was the only track I had with the right word in it). I suspect however that if I list them here, the connection may be more apparent. :)
(a) Stone Roses – Fool's Gold
(b) Kings of Leon – Molly’s Chamber
(c) Steve Harley – Freedom's Prisoner
(d) Doors – Light My Fire
(e) Glen Campbell – By The Time I Get To Phoenix
(f) Prince – Little Red Corvette
You may have seen me mention before now that I occasionally set a pub quiz on Sunday nights, on a loose rota with a few others. The latest attempt at this - well, let's say that things Didn't Quite Go According To Plan.
Anyway, one of the other questionmasters tends to frustrate everybody by having a section called 'Songs Any Cool Dude Would Have In His Record Collection'. While this might be true, the songs themselves tend to be thoroughly obscure. You know, it powered all the way to Number 72! In the indie chart. Of Outer Mongolia. In 1958. Oh, and this was the B-side.
They also tend to be recorded from old, scratchy vinyl onto clapped-out tape and then played through the pub's alleged 'sound system'. Which, it is safe to say, is not the very latest in high-quailty audio reproduction - the landlord keeps trying new bits of equipment, and each time things actually seem to get worse. If you can even hear the Cool Dude songs, you're doing well.
Annoyed by this (and since it's my birthday shortly and I felt like indulging myself) I thought I'd have a go as well - twenty excellent tracks that didn't chart in the UK. Album tracks, B-sides, live tracks, songs that simply weren't hits. Except that mine were (mostly) supposed to be ones that were nonetheless quite well known, or ones where if you listened carefully you could work out the title and/or artist. I decided to circumvent the tape problem by ripping the tracks, extracting an appropriate minute or so of each, and burning a CD to keep it all digital rather than transferring everything to tape. Nothing could possibly go wrong, could it?
A fellow called Murphy is probably shaking his head sadly at this point.
The first snag came when it turned out that the CD player wasn't part of the latest incarnation of the sound system - it was an add-on plugged into it, and thus subject to loss of quality. I should have realised what was about to happen when I arrived at the pub and heard the very faint sound coming from the Abba CD that was playing, but I didn't, so when I came to play the CD it proved impossible to get a decent sound level even with the volume setting jammed on maximum.
Of course, this was far too loud when using the microphone, and whatever settings had been there originally were totally lost trying to get that to work without massive feedback. It's a small pub with a narrow bar; eventually, it turned out that the only way to prevent the mike picking up the sound from the speakers was to lean over the sink, where there was a bit of wall either side to block the sound. Of course, this meant that I was permanently in the way of the barmaid whenever she wanted to clean a glass. And naturally, there was a mouthy member of the ladies darts team shouting "Hold it away from you!" at every bit of feedback (if I'd moved it much further away, I think I'd have needed to hold it with my feet). It would have felt very good to be able to tell her exactly where to stick it. :)
All this might not have mattered if the pub had been as quiet as it sometimes is in the winter, but this time of course it was packed, with many other conversations going on. The overall effect was much what I expect Muffliato would sound like. Eventually I just gave up on the music sction (as had most of the teams), scribbled down full marks for everyone and moved on.
For the second half, I went to the tape - i.e. the cassette I'd rccorded from the CD for use in emergencies. The current cockup seemed to qualify, and for a while it seemed it might actually work - one of the locals managed to adjust the settings appropriately for the 'connection' round. Unfortunately, this was still too loud for using the mike, and by the time we got to the second section of 'Cool Dude' tracks everything seemed back to normal - i.e. you couldn't hear a damn thing.
By this time, I'd overrun so much with all the delays it was getting close to 11pm anyway, so I just gritted my teeth and cut the last three tracks.
Very few points were scored on this section ...
Next week's questionmaster is supposed to be working out some better way of doing things (mind you, he's been saying that for a while now). His recommendation for improving the current sound system was to use a sledgehammer. This is a suggestion I can see the merits of.
All in all, this was a far more irritating and embarrassing experience than it should have been. Let's classify it under the heading "experiments that didn't quite work". Next time, I do "20 Tracks You Could Identify From A Few Bars Even If They Were Being Sung At A Bad Karaoke Session On The Other Side Of The Street".
For the record (pun not intended), the 20 'Cool Dude Tracks' were as follows. Consider them musical Niffles if you will. :)
Beatles – Being for the Benefit of Mr Kite (from Sergeant Pepper)
Simple Minds – Mandela Day (not a single, oddly)
Madness – In the City (B-side of Cardiac Arrest)
Tommy Bruce – Babette (didn't chart)
Robbie Williams – Me and My Monkey (from Escapology)
R.E.M. – Fall On Me (from Life’s Rich Pageant)
UB40 – Tyler (from Signing Off)
Chicory Tip – Cigarettes Women and Wine (didn't chart)
Slade – One Way Hotel (from Sladest)
Boomtown Rats – (I Never Loved) Eva Braun (from the wonderful A Tonic For The Troops)
Oasis – Rock and Roll Star (from Definitely Maybe)
Sammy Davis Jnr – Mr Bojangles (didn't chart)
Leonard Cohen – The Partisan (from Songs From A Room)
Pluto – I Man Bitter (didn't chart)
The Coral – Talkin' Gypsy Market Blues (from Magic and Medicine)
Pulp – Underwear (from Different Class)
Fairground Attraction – Broken By a Breeze (live in Tokyo)
Jam – The Butterfly Collector (B-side of When You’re Young)
The Postal Service – The District Sleeps Alone Tonight (download)
Moody Blues – The Voice (didn't chart, from Long Distance Voyager)
Oh yes - that 'connection' round. The idea is that I play extracts from six tracks; the teams get bonus points by taking a word from either the title or the artist for a general connection unrelated to the songs. Nobody managed to get enough tracks right to spot the connection, which was annoying - I thought (a), (d), and (f) were easy enough, and (b) and (e) very gettable ((c) was tougjh, but it was the only track I had with the right word in it). I suspect however that if I list them here, the connection may be more apparent. :)
(a) Stone Roses – Fool's Gold
(b) Kings of Leon – Molly’s Chamber
(c) Steve Harley – Freedom's Prisoner
(d) Doors – Light My Fire
(e) Glen Campbell – By The Time I Get To Phoenix
(f) Prince – Little Red Corvette
