snorkackcatcher: (Registered Owl Post)
[personal profile] snorkackcatcher
I thought you might like to see a couple of short extracts from the latest fic I'm working on. Since I do seem to write a lot of stuff that's basically Harry Potter genfic, this time I've gone for source material that's quite definitely NC-17 -- namely the E.L.James bonkbuster Fifty Shades of Grey.

The fic itself is basically a good old fashioned High School AU (with Twists which will become apparent as the story unfolds ...) -- this extract is based on the scene in the original where Ana finds herself in Christian Grey's arms for the first time, after he rescues her from nearly being run over:



I threw down a quick bowl of cereal and some orange juice from the carton. I felt excited to go to school, and that scared me. I knew it wasn't the stimulating learning environment I was anticipating, or seeing my new set of friends. If I was being honest with myself, I knew I was eager to get to school because I would see Christian Grey. And that was very, very stupid.

I should be avoiding him entirely after my brainless and embarrassing babbling yesterday. And I was suspicious of him; why should he lie about his eyes? I was still frightened of the hostility I sometimes felt emanating from him, and I was still tongue-tied whenever I pictured his perfect face. I was well aware that my league and his league were spheres that did not touch. So I shouldn't be at all anxious to see him today.

...

My VW Bug seemed to have no problem with the black ice that covered the roads. I drove very slowly, though, not wanting to carve a path of destruction through Main Street.

When I got out of my VW at school, I saw why I'd had so little trouble. Something silver caught my eye, and I walked to the back of the VW — carefully holding the side for support — to examine my tires. There were thin chains crisscrossed in diamond shapes around them. Ray had gotten up who knows how early to put snow chains on my VW. My throat suddenly felt tight. I wasn't used to being taken care of, and Ray's unspoken concern caught me by surprise.

I was standing by the back corner of the VW, struggling to fight back the sudden wave of emotion the snow chains had brought on, when I heard an odd sound.

It was a high-pitched screech, and it was fast becoming painfully loud. I looked up, startled.

I saw several things simultaneously. Nothing was moving in slow motion, the way it does in the movies. Instead, the adrenaline rush seemed to make my brain work much faster, and I was able to absorb in clear detail several things at once.

Christian Grey was standing four cars down from me, staring at me in horror. His face stood out from a sea of faces, all frozen in the same mask of shock. But of more immediate importance was the dark blue van that was skidding, tires locked and squealing against the brakes, spinning wildly across the ice of the parking lot. It was going to hit the back corner of my VW, and I was standing between them. I didn't even have time to close my eyes.

Just before I heard the shattering crunch of the van folding around the VW bed, something hit me, hard, but not from the direction I was expecting. My head cracked against the icy blacktop, and I felt something solid and cold pinning me to the ground. I was lying on the pavement behind the tan car I'd parked next to. But I didn't have a chance to notice anything else, because the van was still coming. It had curled gratingly around the end of the VW and, still spinning and sliding, was about to collide with me again.

A low oath made me aware that someone was with me, and the voice was impossible not to recognize. Two long, white hands shot out protectively in front of me, and the van shuddered to a stop a foot from my face, the large hands fitting providentially into a deep dent in the side of the van's body.

Then his hands moved so fast they blurred. One was suddenly gripping under the body of the van, and something was dragging me, swinging my legs around like a rag doll's, till they hit the tire of the tan car. A groaning metallic thud hurt my ears, and the van settled, glass popping, onto the asphalt — exactly where, a second ago, my legs had been. It was absolutely silent for one long second before the screaming began. In the abrupt bedlam, I could hear more than one person shouting my name.

But more clearly than all the yelling, I could hear Christian Grey's low, frantic voice in my ear.

"Ana? Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." My voice sounded strange. I tried to sit up, and realized he was holding me against the side of his body in an iron grasp.

"Be careful," he warned as I struggled. "I think you hit your head pretty hard."

I became aware of a throbbing ache centered above my left ear.

"Ow," I said, surprised.

"That's what I thought." His voice, amazingly, sounded like he was suppressing laughter.

"How in the..." I trailed off, trying to clear my head, get my bearings. "How did you get over here so fast?"

"I was standing right next to you, Ana," he said, his tone serious again.

I turned to sit up, and this time he let me, releasing his hold around my waist and sliding as far from me as he could in the limited space. I looked at his concerned, innocent expression and was disoriented again by the force of his gold-colored eyes. What was I asking him?

Date: 2013-04-01 02:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] magnetic-pole.livejournal.com
Hee!

The line between reality and joke is very, very thin... M.

Date: 2013-04-01 02:22 pm (UTC)

Date: 2013-04-01 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lareinenoire.livejournal.com
I don't think I can bear to double-check (and I got rid of the copy I'd bought back when I had no idea what Twilight was), but I know what this is. Bravo.

Date: 2013-04-01 03:33 pm (UTC)
ext_2631: (squee || toyluvr)
From: [identity profile] sasha-davidovna.livejournal.com
HP genfic is so boring. I don't know why you waste your time with it when you could be writing great stuff like this. I can't wait to read the rest!!1!

Date: 2013-04-01 03:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nineveh-uk.livejournal.com
What can I say? A work of profound originality, daring, moving, challenging the reader to unlock her innermost soul. I can't wait to read more and learn the twist!

Also, have you considered turning it into a Harry Potter crossover? Christian and Ana are OK, but I can't help thinking of Draco rescuing Hermione, lol!

Date: 2013-04-01 11:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayfly-78.livejournal.com
This I got to read. But not now. When I'm rested and can leave a proper comment.

I will! I promise!

Date: 2013-04-01 11:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayfly-78.livejournal.com
And here I thought you might be doing a satyrical take on 50 shades or something...

Date: 2013-04-02 09:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] parthenia14.livejournal.com
Bzzt?

Oh...

*headdesk*

Ahahahahaha

Date: 2013-04-03 09:24 pm (UTC)
chthonya: Eagle owl eye icon (owleye)
From: [personal profile] chthonya
Nice one. :D

I've only just seen this, and boggled for about 3 seconds before noting the date.

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